I am having a very negative day. First of all, I'm trying my damndest to sit tight and wait for the London Mayoral Election Results, which look grim, which make me ponder whether democracy should in fact be a cultural value, or whether it's a conspiracy of sad liberals setting themselves up to be run by idiots and facists.  Particularly because I know two people who didn't vote, one of whom forgot, the other of whom couldn't be bothered.  I consider these people my friends, and yet on a very basic level I believe that people who don't vote are only fit to live in a dictatorship.  I despise the complacency of it, the casual disregard for the suffragettes, the taking for granted of rights which people in Zimbabwe and Tibet and Burma and China are suffering for - and dying for - right now.

Also, sat through a nice staff briefing presentation today which was a timely reminder that slavery is still endemic in Brazil.  China too.  Did you know that before?  Well, now you do.  It should piss you off.

Finally, I'm not sure if this continues the crushing negativity or injects an element of hope into the proceedings, I direct you to an NPR story featuring my friend Juan Hoffmaister.  You've got to listen to the audio slide show, which rocked my world with its ability to communicate some powerful truths with JuanPa's usual blend of passion and understatement.

Okay, so at the moment I'm watching BBC news live coverage of the Olympic Torch relay in San Francisco, where they've secretly changed the route of the torch, secretly, with absolutely no notice.  It is surrounded by soldiers and police, with media photographers being driven just in front of that in what appears to be a Duck Tours bus.  This is one of the most insane things I've ever seen.

Over the weekend a friend of mine informed me in his most dignified tone of left wing irritation that he finds it hypocritical that people in the US and the UK are upset about Tibet when their own countries are occupying Iraq.  Which is a point, yes.  But the thing that makes the Chinese government so much worse, above Tibet and Burma and Sudan, is the fact that it's a totalitarian, dictatorial regime.  It's NOT the same as all of the other imperialistic countries who get the Olympics (not, deep down, that I give a rat's ass about the Olympics), it's worse.  People in China can't even use the internet.  And this farcical media spectacle/fake torch run really drives it home, the cheerful way in which the Chinese government is happy to lie to paint itself as a legitimate government, to protect its own wizened grip on power.  It would be funny if it wasn't so sad.  What does it mean for the world that one billion people are living under a regime that purposefully misleads them and tries to teach them not to think too deeply about where the power lies?

Also, a voice labelled 'Olympic Historian' has just informed us that the Nazis invented the Olympic flame. Huh.  I did not know that.

Okay, so on Tuesday I went to cast my vote in the Democrats Abroad primary at Portchester Hall in London. The problem was, I was having a massive moral crisis. I was an undecided voter, for the first time in my entire life (and yes, this includes casting a vote for Dukakis in my school's mock election in 1988 and crying when Bush won).

Since Edwards dropped out (and this Krugman column made me cry), I've had a hard time getting excited about the Democratic primary. This isn't just out of character, it's out of keeping with the massive turnouts recorded all over the states which (I assume) means that heaps of other people are terribly thrilled. It's a strange combination of disillusionment, apathy, and indecision that I've never experenced before. Between Obamania and the Hillarybot, who the hell am I going to vote for?

Yes, Obama's very charismatic and a spectacular public speaker. But in terms of policies, he's a well-cut empty suit. Without mandates, his healthcare plan is worthless and will leave half the uninsured still out in the cold. Hillary's plan doesn't do this, but she might destroy the Democratic party. Obama seems to be uniting progressives all over the US but at the same time I'm a little bit creeped out and turned off my his cult of personality. On the other hand, my gut feeling tells me he might be more electable, because so many people (irrationally) hate Hillary. My feminist gut tells me that this is because America is more antifeminist than it is racist, and that a lot of people hate her more for being a strong, intelligent woman in politics than because of her policies (many of which I still find uncool, such as her early support for the Iraq war). Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

So I voted my conscience: I decided not to decide. I'll obviously fight hard for whomever wins the popularity contest nomination, and until then Edwards has my protest vote.

Sez Bob Herbert: "The presidential candidates don’t seem to be rising to the nation’s many crucial challenges with the sense of urgency and the creative vision that is called for. Not yet, at least."

Meanwhile, I've joined Ravelry and am knitting like a fiend. It's nice to have a second hobby when your first one depresses you. I'm slightly alarmed that I've only been on there three days and i've already caught a very subtle Little Women reference in the forums and queued up more than 10 new patterns I want to try. And, of course, I've already found someone who knitted their own Obama hat.

Okay, in the past week I've been running across what seems to be story after story about animal cruelty.  Take, for example, today's article about the Ministry of Defence ending goat testing on submarines.  WHAT? We've been giving goats the bends? For how long? Why is my taxpayer money funding this?

There was also a great New York Times story about rehabilitating the dogs that were rescued from Michael Vick's pitbull fighting ring.  The scale of the abuse is just mind-blowing - including one who had all her teeth pulled out so she could be forcibly mated with other dogs. I just can't imagine how people can do this to other critters; it's such a small step between animal abuse and sociopathy.  At least a lot of them have loving new homes with places like Best Friends Shelter and BADRAP.

Finally, in a somewhat perverse example of animals gettin' their own back, a number of workers in a pork processing facility have picked up an obscure and debilitating neurological illness from - you guessed it - aerosolized pig brains. Okay, you probably didn't guess that. Also, you might feel like barfing. I know I do. 

ETA: I forgot to add a link to the story of Puddles who rose from the dead as Panchito. Which goes to show that sometimes people love animals a little too much.

This article from the the world's most bizarro political rally is so good I have to quote the first two paragraphs in full:

The long days, late nights and constant talk about politics must be getting to me. I had the craziest dream last night -- I was at this old 1930s-era ballroom in Iowa, the kind of place where, like, Duke Ellington would have played in his heyday but that now has to settle for the Tesla reunion tour. I was surrounded by conservative Christians and these weird groups of teenagers who were unusually excited about abolishing the IRS. Chuck Norris was up on stage, talking about putting Marines in headlocks and dancing with his younger, blonder wife. And for some reason, Mike Huckabee was there, playing bass on "Sweet Home Alabama" with a local band called the Boogie-Woogies while MSNBC host/former "Contract With America" revolutionary Joe Scarborough sat in on guitar.

Oh, wait, you're right. That wasn't a dream.

Read the full article. And while you're at it, watch Huckabee's Chuck Norris approved TV ad.

Lest you think the world is going to hell in a wierd-shit-filled handbasket (and I wouldn't blame you if you did), here is the new Radiohead album and a deer strikes back. Go deer.

Yes yes yes, I know I need to write about Fez but (a) I am lazy and (b) I am overworked, so I'm just going to do the briefest of brief news roundups.

First of all, the new SimCity Societies game takes climate change into account. Ooooooooooh. I wonder how many wind turbines I can build without imposing Sweden-style taxes. I haven't played a full game of SimCity since 1997, when it woke nurtured my inner dictator. If I bought it now, would I be able to resist playing it 24 hours a day?

Also, if you haven't seen a story about George the Giant Hedgehog, you have to visit the Wildlife Aid website right now. Then, if you're me, you'll dream of adopting yet another morbidly obese pet, and fantasize about volunteering there on the weekends and bottle-feeding the hedgehogs.

Finally, in a story that may make you spit blood, a Saudi Arabian 19 year old was gang-raped 14 times. Then she was sentenced to six months in jail and 200 lashes for being in the car of a man who wasn't a relative. This sort of thing actually makes me so homicidal it makes me want to bomb people. I'm an American, we do that.

Today I went to do a workshop at a conference up in Birmingham organised by my friend Martha. I had to get up at 7:30, which, for a Saturday, is pretty darn early.

( I think I never fully woke up. )
But it's not over. Tonight is jenbee's birthday party and despite my stupor, I really want to go and give her a hug. But I can't. Because I don't know where the party is - I forgot to find out ahead of time. she still doesn't have a mobile, and I don't have the numbers of anyone who might be at the party. you see? i am pants.

I wonder if I'll get lost or fall over on my way to bed.

Matt's Dad's beach house (where Matt and I just went on holiday) has no cable and no broadband. I survived five days without the internet! Yay me! I missed my beloved interweb.

The weather was relentlessly shit, so walks on the beach weren't that great, but I rediscovered the phone and actually called people for a change, which was great. We also watched an eclectic blend of DVDs: Buffy season 7, Firefly, Gilmore Girls, and The Wire. That new scarf is half done, and I even did some French homework. Though not much.

Meanwhile, I got really het up about the UK government blatantly discriminating against Bulgarians and Romanians. We have JobCentres in Poland but Romanians can only work in agriculture and food processing? WHAT?

("John Reid, John Reid, this is your conscience. I'm wondering how you sleep at night.")

Finally, I pray every day for a Democratic takeover of Congress. Perhaps then I might be able to decamp myself from this racist country to my native, marginally less racist, one.

Yesterday was the hottest July day ever recorded.

My favorite part:
'BBC Midlands Today's weather team faced an unexpected problem on Wednesday - their graphics only featured temperatures as high as 32C and had to be remade with numbers up to 38.'

Good thing that climate change nonsense is all just a myth designed by fiendish scaremonger environmentalists looking for fat donations to their namby-pamby liberal charities.